i don't know what should be the tittle for this post actually, because i just wanna write about my dilema these last couple days. i hate it when i can't get anything i want.
i told you before about my plan to go on a family vacay, rite? i probably won't go anyway.. i decided not to go, because my parents will go umrah, instead of Bali, it's obvious to them to choose umrah when they know the date were crossed..
so that leave me with my sis's family and her husband family, and i will be an outsider (i hate the term, made me remember something LOL).. it made me tremendously upset, though i got something to pick me up a little, a new mobile phone.. but then my sister told me, not to expect any holiday from her, because she already bought me a mobile phone.. boohoo.
well, i could always ask my parents for a holiday trip, but the thought of it already made me feel uneasy.. i just don't wanna act all childishly, screaming everything i want and push them to fulfill it, it was just so not me.. i never feel comfortable to ask my parents anything i want, i'm used to do that to my sisters, since i got 5 of them, and because i'm their little sister they tend to spoil me, lol..
the problem is, i know if i ask my parents, they'll try to fulfill it, eventho i don't scream at all (once again, so not me), but after that i kinda hate the feeling, that i'm going to splurge the money for unimportant stuff in this twenty something age, instead of going to work and giving them money.. well the truth is i'm not ready to release the 'youngest child' title i got for so long and starts to act all adult like, but i have to start somewhere, don't i ?
ahh what a complicated thoughts to start my morning..
have a nice weekend!
♥ R
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