Mind over matter.

i am left abashed by the sudden turns of things.
clenching my fists and jaw, and cringe my face every time i remember it.
i am not one who can get tease, and stay cool. i am bit old fashioned like that.
but i hate how people misinterpret me. because things got a little bit out of control and awkward.

i have this determination, that i should stop. because i really really hate situation like this.
and then again, i kinda think.. i have to be my old self, where everything are under my control, even my own feeling.
i should not care, nor interested. for God sake, it's not good for my health.

just like what i have retweeted yesterday "it's a matter of mind over matter".
it should never be the other way around.
just like what i used to say "if i think i am happy, believe that i am indeed happy, therefore i will be happy" as simple as that. period.
it should be just like that in this situation. i won't give in.
i just need to spend a lot more time with other people, find a new comfortable zone, whilst holding tightly to my usual peers.

i really really hate situation like this and it's fucking uncomfortable.
i am kinda in rage right now. and i feel like cursing to the whole lot.

hope for a brand new day tomorrow and simply content and be happy again.

then again, on the other note, tomorrow should be perfect, as my best friends will be officially engage.
Congratulations Ninta & Arya! wishing you both a happiness through and through. :)